Someone once said that life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react. There comes a point in our lives where we all know that we cannot continue to give excuses for our actions. That we are sorely responsible for our decisions and how we choose to lead our lives. But in an age where the rates of unemployment are at its highest, Gender Based Violence is also on the rise every single day and let us not forget security is still an issue for the country and has not been entirely sorted. The morality of young people is worse than a stinking dead rat in the house and with most embracing the so called ‘sponsorship’ Programme then it becomes hard for them to report cases of Gender Based Violence. More so most of them as old as 25 years and above are using sexual violence as grounds to manipulate and extort others. Hence it becomes a necessity for people to be educated about the sexual offences Act that way those who are violated can come forward and those rotten fruits among the many can be warned that Gender Violence is a serious issue and cannot be used as grounds to manipulate others for personal gain.
“Aki Daktari, sikumbuki nini ilitendeka lakini niliamka tu Bila Panti.” That was the first statement Jane made when she came to the hospital .She is 26 years old and was accompanied by her sister Alphin to the hospital for treatment because they suspected that she had been raped. As Jane narrated her story, she said it all began with her boss Joel who had set his eyes on her and was a persistent fella.
Jane had turned him down on several occasions and even though he was persistent she stood her grounds. With the rainy days of late, Joel offered to take Jane home one evening and being in the car with him was the last thing Jane remembers.
Joel was arraigned and he too had his side of the story. His story was the complete opposite of what Jane said. According to him he had never been interested in Jane and only saw her as an employee. He confessed that Jane had been trying to extort money from him .She had told him that she would drop the charges if he paid her. He further added that he had taken Jane home as it as dark and rainy but he never did anything to her.
Further investigations were done and from the medical report, there was no penetration. Jane lied! She lied about being sexually abused to extort money from Joel.
Most people do not realize the weight of a sexual abuse claim. Some think that it doesn’t carry heavy penalties or it won’t be followed up. In a past article, I shared how a child lied about being sexually abused and the consequences that followed up. But imagine when it’s an adult lying about being sexually abused in order to manipulate someone else. Most men have fallen prey to this with most who may have been sexually involved end up paying large amounts of money to avoid being dragged to court even when the other party consented to having sex.
We cannot say that all those people who are victims of Sexual violence are pretentious but we cannot also rule out the fact that there exist people who take this kinds of issues lightly and decide to use it against other people. It is important that we know the laws on sexual violence. For those who sit around and fake that they have been abused, this is not a game in fact it’s nothing to joke about. Those who have experienced this dreadful ordeal would tell you the impact it has on them and how sorry they feel that you think it’s something to joke about.
Let us break the silence on any form of Gender Based Violence and report to police such cases.